My brain is mush…

So I was going to post on something totally mundane, like how I hate when people who are obviously friends or family or, shock horror, the author posing to be someone else, give 5-star reviews to a book that sucks. And I mean really sucks. But I don’t want to whinge today.
Plus, I’m struggling at the moment with my writing, so what better way to sort out my shit than to tell the world about it (or the 5 people who actually follow this blog).
My last blog was on procrastinating, and while I have been doing some more of that over the last week or so, I’ve actually been so bad that I’ve been procrastinating on my procrastination. Sitting down to my laptop, opening up my web browser, and then shutting it back down again because I couldn’t even be bothered to do any research.
To be honest, I feel like I’m all out of ideas. My brain is so full at the moment, I feel like it’s empty. Like I went to bed with stuff in my head, and it all leaked out while I was sleeping.
I’ve read over all the stuff I’ve evr started, even going back to stuff I wrote nearly ten years ago – that was really painful to read let me tell you. I mean, I’ve been avoiding it for so long because I knew it was crap, but man, I had no idea how bad it was! On the flip-side, at least I know I’ve improved. So, that made me a little happier. But even going over everything I have ever written in order to try to spark some sort of idea, any idea, I still came up blank.
Now, some Well-Meaning People would tell me to suck it up and just write – write something, anything, just to get over this little speed bump, and then once your brain is back in gear, pick something you actually want to be working on again and get stuck in.
Well, Well-Meaning People, I don’t mean to be rude, but you suck it up this time, cos I have a better idea. One that is far more fun, at least a little productive (though not necessarily for my writing, but meh), and is oh so destructive.
My wife and I have been slowly renovating our little house, and we have finally come to the point when we get our brand spanking new kitchen. Therefore, the old green and orange shocker needs to go – this weekend. My plan then, to work out my shit, is complete and utter destruction. Well, maybe not complete, but possibly utter. Anyway, this old kitchen needs to go, and I have a sledge-hammer with my name on it. And every time I swing that baby at that old crappy kitchen, I’ll be imagining it’s one of my neurotic characters who won’t do as they’re told or those who have fallen blindly into one of my gaping plot holes, never to be seen again. And I’ll be cursing my dead-ends and loose-ends, and when I’m finished with them, I’m going to kick my muse’s butt good and proper. Skip out on me at short notice, will she!
Then, after the old kitchen is gone and the space in the kitchen is a totally blank canvas, and the decks of my over-taxed brain are cleared, I’ll have a break – albeit a very brief one. I’m taking a week’s holiday (starting tomorrow), so after the kitchen is in mid-week, I’ll sit back down at my laptop, and hopefully coax my muse back with some quiet self-reflection and maybe a little chocolate (she’s a sucker for Smarties). As for the characters, well, if they’ve managed to survive my rampage, then they’ll be stronger for it, and I may, may, find a part for them in one of my novels.

Happy long weekend everyone.

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